Social Dancing: 7 Myths Debunked

By Krista Greenwell

Social dancing can be a scary thing if you have never explored the dance club scene. If studio events are your only dance experience to date, you might have some false ideas about social dancing. Maybe these ideas come from movies or television, maybe we create stories in our minds to prevent us from trying something new, or maybe they come from hearing others talk about their false ideas. Regardless of where they come from, these myths are simply that: myths! So let us set the record straight. 

But first— before we get into common misconceptions, let us clarify something: what is social dancing? Well, it is partner dancing in a social setting as opposed to the learning, performance, or competitive setting. Picture this- remember that scene in Dirty Dancing where Baby is forced to dance a Foxtrot with the resort owner’s son? She feels stuck with him and he seems not so cool. This brings me to Myth #1.

Myth #1 – Social dancing is antiquated and out of fashion

Wrong! Don’t get me wrong, the Foxtrot is an awesome dance. In fact, ballroom dancing is more than just your traditional Waltz, Tango, and Foxtrot. Ballroom dancing is defined as any dance that you do with a partner and includes everything from Rumba, Cha Cha and Swing to Salsa, Bachata and Zouk. Partner dancing is getting more and more popular; from swing clubs to latin clubs to monthly socials, finding somewhere to dance is becoming easier and easier to find. It is anything but antiquated and old fashioned. 

Ok, so now you might agree that it is the new and upcoming thing to be able to social dance, but you might be thinking you are just not in that stage of life any longer. Social dancing is for people who are: younger, empty nesters, retirees etc. – you fill in the blank. Well, let’s address that.

Myth #2 – Social Dancing is only for (blank) people (young, old, retired, etc.)

Nope – not true. The social dance scene is definitely not just for certain groups; it is a very diverse community. You will see people of all ages and backgrounds. Sometimes, the age-advanced people feel like they are the minority, other times, younger people feel the same way. The social dance community in the greater Cincinnati-Dayton area accurately reflects the diversity of the dance community. You will see everything- from the young professional having a good time with friends, to couples leveling-up their date night game, to retirees making more time for fun.

You might now agree that your age or stage of life does not affect your ability to fit in on the dance floor, but your friend or significant other doesn’t dance, so what do you do? Keep reading… 

Myth #3 – You must have a dance partner to social dance

If that were true then lots of people would be very sad and excluded from the dance scene. An appropriate word that has been used is community. From personal experience, I have found the social dance world to be a very friendly and inviting community. Now, there are always bad apples in anything, but those are not the norm. Since it’s such a social environment you do not have to have a dance partner to go social dancing. You just need to be a little brave and willing to dance with people you don’t know. Even if you bring a partner with you, still be willing to dance with other people as well.   

Well, I don’t want people to think I’m looking for a date or something, so I don’t think I will dance with people I don’t know. 

Myth #4 Social Dancing is basically a dating service

Social dancing can be a great way to meet people, it can also be a great way to improve confidence in one’s self. Meeting people and improved self confidence can help in finding a date if that is your goal. However – social dancing is not a dating service and accepting a random guy or girl’s dance invitation does not constitute interest outside of dancing. You can just go dancing to have fun. You can dance without being concerned about whether you have a partner or if your significant other is there or not. Dance with everyone and anyone you would like.

But, what if I don’t feel comfortable dancing with everyone? That is ok too, let us address that point.

Myth #5 You have to dance with everyone who asks you

There are many reasons to say “no, thank you” to a dance invitation. Maybe you have just danced for the last few songs and want a break, you are talking to a friend and do not want to interrupt your conversation, or you just aren’t comfortable dancing with that specific person for whatever reason. As long as you are polite and respectful, it is perfectly fine to smile and say no thank you. You might want to include why you are saying no, that way if you want them to ask again later they will, but there is never pressure to dance with someone when you’re not interested at that moment. 

You might think, “Well, saying no isn’t the problem, it is the fact that everyone on the floor looks like they know way more than I do that keeps me from dancing!” Valid point, you might feel that way but others might as well.

Myth #6 Social dancing is only for really good dancers

It isn’t that ‘only good dancers go social dancing’, it’s that social dancing makes you a good dancer! Social dancing is not the only thing that helps make you better, but it is definitely a great tool to improve your dancing skills. Plus, it is a low pressure environment to have fun and not be as focused on exact precision of your steps and technique. Relax a little and have fun no matter your skill level. Social dancing can enhance lead and follow skills and help you be creative when you have to maneuver on crowded floors or in different environments. 

If you have been dancing a while and have a good knowledge of technique and patters this might not be a concern for you but there is something else that might give you pause about social dancing. So for those of you who are on your way to mastering dance or are at least exceeding the social norm, keep reading. 

Myth #7 Social dancing teaches you bad dancing habits

You consider yourself a serious ballroom dancer, and really value good technique and style on the dance floor. You aren’t sure that social dancing is for you because you hear that social dancers do not have good technique or they have bad posture or this or that? Social dancing is not nearly as formal as dancing in a studio dance event, and it is true that you might want to downplay your amazing arm styling and big movements as to not hit others on the dance floor. However, when dancing with someone who let’s say has ‘less-than-ideal-posture’, you can focus on maintaining your own posture, and not stooping to their level (see what I did there, a posture joke). Same goes for other techniques- just because your partner for that song isn’t focusing on good dancing, that doesn’t mean that you can’t! Look at is as a challenge: can I keep good posture and clear footwork even though he/she (partner) isn’t???

Final thoughts

Social dancing is not for everyone, but if you’ve thought about it and the idea of it sounds fun, but were hesitant because of some misconceptions, then go give it a try. You never know if it it is for you or not until you have tried. Sometimes social dancing requires a couple of tries before you get the hang of it. And sometimes it requires trying a couple of places to find the right fit. Now go dance, and remember, have fun!